One Saturday at Tom’s


Note: Neddie Jingo wrote an excellent post about B. Kliban back in January of this year. That was my introduction to this wonderful site. I thought I’d share this bit off fluff that I wrote over at my place back in May of ‘06.


I was in the mood for some B. Kliban today.

Way back in the mid-80’s, back before all this bullshit was happening, or maybe at the start of all this bullshit, back when I was young, there was this one Saturday afternoon at my friend Tom’s house. He lived in Melville, Long Island, NY. He had a perfect house for parties, with a built-in pool, a picnic table, a gas grill, and a refrigerator stocked with beer. Sound was there that day, as were our future ex-wives.

I really miss those days sometimes, except I was with Stella instead of the Viscountess. Stella was like a backpack full of asphalt.

Never mind that though.

On that day, after some delicious grilled country ribs courtesy of Sound, a few beers and probably a joint or two, Tom said, “You guys want to see some B. Kliban Cartoons?”

“B. Kliban?”

“Wait right there!”

Tom went running into the house. Sound must have lifted an eyebrow. Stella sat there looking bored. In a flash, here comes Tom rushing back to the picnic table with a stack of paperback books in his hands, already laughing. Tom’s laugh itself is funny. His laugh makes everyone else laugh, regardless of how funny (or unfunny) the original impetus to the laugh may have been. When Tom starts laughing, the party kicks into interstellar overdrive.

He flips open the first book and shows us this cartoon:

… and waits for a reaction. As I start to chuckle, Tom falls into a serious guffaw, laughing as he inhales so he can laugh louder on the exhale. Sound and I start to laugh, which makes Tom laugh even louder, which makes us laugh even louder, while our perplexed future ex’s exchange looks that range from mild amusement, (Mrs. Tom) to annoyance, (Mrs. Sound) to sleepy (Stella.)

This continued non-stop for the next hour or so. I still can’t find my favorite from that day. It was a picture of long, single story frame house. On the roof it said, “Fred’s House.” I can’t remember exactly, but I think right next to the house was a creature shaped exactly like the house, and “Fred” was written on him in the same handwriting. We must have laughed for 5 minutes straight over that one.

Anyway, it’s Friday. I hope these bring some amusement to the beginning of a safe and enjoyable weekend for all.


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