49th Annual Grammys. Let’s Get Down Tonight.


YOU READY? YOU READY? YOU READY?

Cuz we’re going to do our best to bring SexyBack tonight. Just a little nod to the boy who I think is going to be Mr. Grammy tonight. Justin Timberlake.

I have a confession. I really like that song “SexyBack.”

Yeah!

My son and The Skimmer — they’re both appalled. Oh well. I like it. But, if someone could please explain why Justin Timberlake could be considered sexy at all, I’d really like to know.

Alright, it’s almost showtime, people. Are you excited? I know I am.

The PoliceHere’s another thing. I really don’t know all the new fangled little kiddies that are gonna be up on stage with their boobs hanging out and whatnot. So, if you want to tell me who they are in the comments, that would be great.

The Police are kickin’ it off with Roxanne. Shoot. That the *one* I didn’t want them to do. I never liked that one. They sound good. It would be fun to be there. It’s fun to be here though. Right?

I’m not sure about that vest Sting’s got on.

The Skimmer kind of looks like Sting. In case anyone cares to know. I’d never let The Skimmer wear a vest like that though.

Roxxxxaaaane! Put on the red light.

They sound really good.

Standing-0 for The Police!
8:03: Jamie Foxx. C’mon Now! Keep it goin’. I saw you gettin’ down. C’mon make some noise — let’s have a party here tonight.

Did Jamie Foxx just diss Ohio? Why-o-why-o-why-o? Why does every show that’s live blogged have to diss Ohio?

FIRST AWARD: Best Pop Collaboration

Winner: Tony Bennett and Stevie Wonder for For Once In My Life

Well, how could that possibly have missed? Great duo.

Really nice acceptance speech till Target was mentioned. Target? How lame was that, Mr. Bennett? Geez.

Joan Baez! Yay! Introducing The Dixie Chicks. You go, girls.

They sound really good, too. I like Natalie’s hair like that. It looks good dark. But, that’s just a shallow comment that I should even make. Cuz these women, to me are just great. Just great!

Saying I better shut up and sing!

Yeah, right.

That Chevy spot doesn’t work. I know what they were trying to do, but it’s too long or something.

8:16: Thoughts on the show so far. I agree with Tony down in the comments. The Police only did ONE number? What? What was the point, then? So far the show’s pretty good, I think. Except for Tony Bennett mentioning TARGET, his best sponsor EVER. God, give me a break with that.

And can I also just say that I am *heartbroken* that my video didn’t post up top? Heartbroken.

NEW GRAMMY CATEGORY: MOST HEARTBROKEN GRAMMY LIVE BLOGGER

WINNER: Blue Girl In A Red State

Ok. That’s all I’m gonna say about that. I’m a big girl and big girls don’t cry.

Sniffle.

8:18: Prince introduced Beonce (The Skimmer’s favorite — dirty old man.)

She can sing. And she’s gorgeous. I think she has it all.

I hate her.

Kidding!

…I bet if she tried to post a video in her blog post it would work…

8:22: The Black Eyed Peas should be shot for “My Humps” — that’s all I’m sayin’.

For now.

BEST R&B ALBUM — Is Jamie Foxx a singer or an actor? I know he does both, but I don’t see him as doing both. I see him as an actor and a wannbee singer. Is that so wrong?

WINNER: Mary J. Blige

I like her. I’ve read her “story.” She had a tough life growing up and Puff Daddy or Pee Diddy or whatever his name is now “discovered” her. She’s talented and I’m glad someone cared.

8:26: Queen Latifa — she’s a cool chick, too. Justin Timberlake! Told you! Look at him! Is he cute? Is he? Is he sexy? Am I missing something there?

It’s a commercial break so it would be a good time to say this. I also made my own commercial! And of course, that probably won’t post either.

Why does technology hate me?

There are a lot of commercials. Not that that’s surprising at all. Mine’s better than any of these.

Geez. Lots of spots. Ok, we’re back.

8:33: There he is! Sexy Justin. He didn’t have to think about what he was doing. Good for him. Should I be giving him more credit? I think he’s “lucky” — not Mr. Talent. Ok, here he goes. It’s his “special” song. Let’s all be the judge of that.

See. I’ve got a problem with someone like him. It’s not that I wish him any ill will. I don’t. I hope he lives and long and healthy life. But, why does he get this life? Am I being too harsh? What is he? He’s just a kid who can kind of sing. And, um, aren’t there about 100 million others just like him?

I don’t get it.

And how did he get Cameron Diaz?

That’s what I’d like to know.

I would never buy that song.

Oh my God! What is he doing with that camera? It’s hard enough to look at him from afar, let alone up close and distorted! Whose bright idea was that?

Egads. Egads to the nth degree.

8:38: LIFE TIME ACHIEVEMENT HONOREES

I’ve always liked The Doors. I seem to be in the minority there. Or people just won’t admit it for some reason.

BEST FEMALE R&B VOCAL: WINNER, Mary J. Blige

Why does she have to have those tatoos like that? I don’t get that. I liked her speech.

Success shows who you really are. And she’€™s gonna build bridges, not burn them down.

8:41: Commercial break!

8:48: Stevie introduces Corinne Bailey Rae

Sounds nice. Stevie’€™s sticking up for the kiddies. That’€™s good. We can get too jaded, I guess.

I like her.

8:50: I don’€™t know who this is? Who is it? Is this the same song Corinne Bailey Rae was just singing? Is it? I’€™m confused. Sounds the same. Oh there she is in the shadows. Hopefully they’€™ll sing together. Yep. There they do. Pretty.

8:54: John Maer? Is that how you spell his name?

Gravity is working against me now

And gravity oh, it wants to bring me down

Sounds good.

Someone else would be a better judge of guitar playing than me. Was he good? I thought it sounded pretty tight.

8:58: BEST POP VOCAL ALBUM:

I hope James Blunt wins cuz I know Tbogg’s really pulling for him.
WINNER: Continum, John Mayer -€” is that how you spell his name?

Sorry, Tbogg. There€’s always next year.

My Grammy Moment Finalists: Are you guys text messaging like crazy out there at home? I know I am! I may not know how to post videos while live blogging, but I know how to text message! Yes, I do!

Not.

9:05: Shayera performing at The Grammys? Why didn’€™t you tell us?

Oh wait. That’€™s not our Shayera. It’€™s Shakira!

Oooh baby! Sexy outfit. Humina-humina!

Oooh!

Goodness!

That‒s quite the sexy little get up. Can she sing? She’€™s got everything else. I mean, does it even matter if she can sing? I’€™m hearing drooling coming from downstairs. Swear. I can hear drooling.

Was that music? Or porn?

9:09: Seal and Burt Bacharach -€” Burt’€™s lookin’€™ old. Aw. Happens to the best of us, I guess.

Nice announcer cut-in. Doh!

9:10: SONG OF THE YEAR -€” I’€™m pulling for The Dixie Chicks

Tbogg’€™s pullin’€™ for James Blunt. (I like that song.)

WINNER: Yay! The Dixie Chicks!! Not Ready To Make Nice.

Wonder if they care? How could they not? I’m glad for them.

Sorry Tbogg. There’s always next year.

Natalie Maines: For the first time in my life, I’m speechless. She’€™s adorable. And the other two could’ve kicked her to the curb, but they stuck by her. Good on them.

BREAKING NEWS! My friend brushabrusha thinks Justin Timberlake’s all sexy!

Pshaw!

9:20: Gnarls Barkley

I like this song. But, why are they dressed like airline pilots?

That’s Crazy!

Who are those pod people standing up in the back with those red suits on?

9:23: BEST RAP ALBUM

What’€™s Kanye gonna say? Goodness. You just never know. (Please excuse me if I’€™m spelling everyone’€™s name wrong. You’€™re just gonna have to deal.)

Ooooh. I hope The Roots win.

WINNER: Who? Who? Who? Who? I didn’€™t catch it. Was it The Roots?

Who is that? Ludicrice?

Special shout out to Bill O’€™Reilly? Was that a joke? Was it? What?

TARGET AND BILL O’€™REILLY.

Ok. Blue Kid just said that was a joke. I’€™m just the lame mom. So sue me.

9:27: Are you guys text messaging? I know I am! Brushabrusha -€” too bad you didn’€™t get in on that contest. You coulda been with Justin!

Sigh.

9:33: Why is Quentin Taratino at The Grammy? Oh, this is the guy that was in Crash.

True music royalty: Mary J. Blige, She’€™s in love -€” let’€™s listen.

I like that song. But, on a shallow note. Is it prudish, or “out of it” to hate those tatoos? How can you have a beautiful dress on like that with a pretty hair style and then have those tatoos on your upper arms? And I don’€™t just dislike them on women. I don’t like when men have them either. I’€™ve just never ‘€œgotten’€ the whole tatoo thing.

9:39: BEST COUNTRY ALBUM -€” Why is Luke Wilson there? Did Jennifer already leave? I know she likes him. Why is he there? What does he have to do with anything?

WINNER: The Dixie Chicks! Yay!

Boy, I’m glad Luke Wilson was there. He just made the moment.

I like them.

9:48: I don’€™t like Reba and I don’€™t even remember why. What did she do? I can’€™t remember.

There’€™s only ONE great Texan to me. Res Publica. Ooops. I mean, two. And midniter.

Ms. Carrie Underwood! Is she good? I have no idea. Let’€™s see. She’€™s alright. Whatever.

I was just reading the comments. So, no one seems to be into The Dixie Chicks, huh? I’€™m surprised.

9:52: Who is this? Rascal Flats? He looks like that actor from the credit card commercials that got a bit part on Studio 60.

Why would anyone re-do Hotel California? Wasn’t it enough the first time?

Reese Witherspoon playing June Carter and saying in Walk The Line was better than Carrie Underwood playing Carrie Underwood.

Just sayin’.

I don’t like this Flats Rascal person singing Life in the Fast Lane. This is a song I crank when it comes on the radio. I’€™m sort of offended by this version.

Wouldn’€™t country music fans be totally offended by this song? Life in the Fast Lane? Pills, sex, etc.?

10:00: BEST NEW ARTIST

WINNER: Carrie Underwood. Don’€™t get it. At all. She’€™s ok. But, so are 100 million other people. This is why I’€™ve always hated The Grammys.

10:08: Samuel L. Jackson and Christine Ricci introduce Smokey Robinson

He looks a little jacked-up or something. A little wired about the eyes. I like him though. I bet he gets tired singing ‘€œThe Tracks of My Tears.’€ Wouldn’t you?

10:11: Lionel Ritchie

I’€™ll probably get creamed for this. But I used to really like him. He sounds good. Off subject. I don’€™t know a lot about his daughter. Just wanted I kind of hear here and there. But, it always surprised me that he made that much money that she’s living the same sort of life as Paris Hilton.

Wait. What is this? What? Scary skeleton-masked people dancing around. Is this ‘€œChris Brown’€? Would I sound really old if I said, this kid’€™s in the same league as Smokey Robinson? If so, I’m out of it. First clue to me. That you have to have all those dancers around you. If you can’€™t just stand there and sing and need all that other stuff, you’re not in Smokey’€™s league.

10:18: Christine Aguilera

I don’€™t own one song by her, but I really think she can sing. Pretty darn good. (Wonder what’€™s being said in the comments? Commercial break! I think I’€™ll check ‘€˜em out.)

10:26: The suit’€™s on. Who is he? Talking about his dedicated music teachers? He’€™s full of it. I don’€™t even know him and I don’€™t trust him. He acts like he likes Ann Lee, but I don’€™t buy it.

Who is this guy? He looks like Ron Silverman’s brother.

Yes, someone please call George W. Bush and Dick Cheney and tell them how important music is. I’€™m sure they’€™ll be thrilled.

10:37: Ok, we’€™re back with David Spade and some half-dressed chicky babe -€” introduces Ludicrice. Now I can see what all the hubub’€™s about.

I’m not qualified to talk about this music. It doesn’t hit me on a gut level (I’d like to hit you on a gut level - name the movie!) Blige looks better like that, though. I like that red jumpsuit she’€™s got on.

Do me a favor, now and close you eyes. And picture us runnin’ away together.

10:43: James Blunt, You’€™re Beautiful -€” I like this song.

Is this the kind of guy that women like, but men don’€™t? Seems to be that way. Or, the men just won’t admit to it.

I saw your face

In a crowded place

And I don’€™t know what to do

Cuz I’€™ll never be with you

I bet I’m in the minority here, but I thought that was really pretty.

I just caught a comment down in the thread about ‘big productions.’€ I agree. I think most times the ‘€œbig productions’€ try to cover up the fact that the talent’€™s not really there. Not every single time, but most times. Did Madonna start that?

10:52: Jennifer Hudson in The My Grammy Moment Competition Moment

Oh, the one girl won. And then she ran away. Oh, there she is. With Sexy Justin. He doesn’€™t sound bad, and she doesn’€™t either. Take your chance, girlfriend!

Was that it? Oh, no. They’€™re on that walkway. Don’t like this song.

Are there any good songs anymore?

They all sound like this.

Not my cup of tea.

Very forgettable.

I wish I knew that girl’s name. I hate calling her ‘that girl.’€ She needs to project more. You can’€™t hear her.

I’€™m happy for her. But, whatever.

Target Tony’€™s back.

Why is Quentin Taratino wearing a medal?

RECORD OF THE YEAR: Why is QT talking like that?

Ok, I won’t pull for the Chicks this time.

I’€™ll pull for James Blunt.

Ha!

WINNER: The Dixie Chicks

I’m happy for them. They’€™ve had a rough time and they stuck to it. Takes guts.

Yes, you just won Record of the Year -€” now get the hell off the stage. Now.

I just read a comment by Watson down in the thread. Yes! This show is loooooong. But, is it as long as that new James Bond movie?

11:08: Chris Rock -€” love him.

Red Hot Chili Peppers. Does the one guy have what Iggy had?

Discuss.

I’€™m bummed they don’€™t have their socks on.

11:13: Al Gore and Queen Latifa

I’€™m sure Al Gore’s getting all that applause! How funny! I’d like to see Gore out there jivin’€™ it up with Ludicrice. Bet Gore’€™s got the moves.

Not.

BEST ROCK ALBUM: Red Hot Chili Peppers

See? Those tatoos on that guy look ick, too.

Yes, we do need more rock bands. I agree. ‘Good’€ rock bands.

Oh my God! I’€™ve become a grandmother in the time this show has been on. Years have passed and my son is now 32 and married!

How loooong is this show?

TW? Where do I pick up my check?

Word has it that this show’s wrapping up. Let’€™s see if it’s true.

11:23: ALBUM OF THE YEAR: With Don Henley and Scarlet

Do you have any advice for me?

No.

Was that a joke? That wasn’€™t funny. I think the presenters left a lot to be desired tonight.

I bet the Dixie Chicks win again. It’€™s a sweep for The Chicks.

Or will it be Justin?

Or will it be Mrs. Watson’€™s faves?

Nope. It’€™s The Chicks again.

Aw. The one girl’€™s crying.

Sniffle.

Good. Good. Good. Happy for them.

Well, you crazy kids. It seems as though we’ve rocked around the clock tonight. I think we actually rocked around it several times. What a long show. On a scale of 1 - 10, I’d give it a 5. It started out strong and then lost steam in the middle and never got going again.

Some random thoughts:

Why did The Police only do one song -€” and why was that one song was Roxanne?

There were very strange presenter choices. Luke Wilson, Al Gore, Scarlett Johansen, Quentin Taratino and his medal.

I wish my video plan would have worked. Oh well.

Old music is better than new music. But I’€™m old.

Justin Timberlake is not sexy, but that girl that won that contest sure was.

So was Shirika. Yeesh!

And The Dixie Chicks deserved it. All.

Night, kids! Thanks for sticking it out with me! It was a lot of fun.

UPDATE:

Last night I live blogged The Grammy Awards; It was fun, but it was long.  I had some technical difficulty.  A video I made for the Pre-Show portion of the evening wouldn’t work.  Which really bummed me out. 

But, for some reason — all of a sudden — as if by magic!  It’s working this morning.  Figures.  I want to share it with all of you now .  It’s cool, plus the music’s great.

Thanks to everyone who showed up last night.

Now.  Onto the Pre-Show That Never Was.

By Neddie Jingo!
"In My Room"

Tom Watson
"1919"

Glue Birl & Jeddie Ningo
"Christmas Time Is Here"

Larry Jones, Revision 99
"Mack the Knife"

Bobby Lightfoot and The Orchestra of Sweet Regret
"Station Road"

Brendan Tween, Hell Yeah! Git Yer Northern Aggression Here!
"Doomsday"

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February 11th, 2007
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